What Ice Dams and “Food School” Taught Me About Operational Leadership

Some of the most complex leadership work I’ve done in the past eight weeks hasn’t had a title or a performance review:

• Managing ice dams in our New England home
• Running “Food School” for my four-year-old

It’s messy. It’s invisible. And it’s operational leadership at its finest.

Most people conceptually understand that working moms are capable. Resilient. Strong.

But what does that actually look like in real time — with emotional resistance, competing priorities, and deliverables that still need to be met?

Because there are no days off.

For the past eight weeks, my husband and I have been taking our four-year-old to what we call “Food School.” He hasn’t eaten protein since he was fifteen months old. Entering therapy wasn’t casual. It required research, assessment, financial planning, long-term strategy, and emotional readiness.

At the same time, our home has been impacted by ice dams. I’ve been managing the insurance claim, sourcing the mitigation and restoration company, reviewing detailed remediation documents, coordinating timelines, and ensuring we understand every line item of what needs repair.

No title.
No formal authority.
No applause.

And yet the leadership required is real.

Risk assessment.
Vendor management.
Documentation review.
Financial oversight.
Timeline execution.
Stakeholder communication.
Emotional regulation.
Strategic patience.

All while continuing paid work.
All while running a coaching business.
All while mothering.

I’m not sharing this to be heroic.

It’s cognitively exhausting.

It’s a mountain of open tabs. It’s invisible labor layered on top of visible work. It’s holding my child’s anxiety while managing contractor deadlines. It’s reading insurance language at night and showing up regulated in the morning.

It is operational leadership in the middle of uncertainty.

And here’s what I want recruiters and job seekers to understand:

When I say I bring emotional intelligence to operations — this is what I mean.
When I say I excel at strategic oversight — this is what I mean.
When I say I can hold complexity and still deliver — this is what I mean.

Working parents — especially mothers — are constantly:

• Anticipating risk
• Managing stakeholders with competing needs
• Negotiating timelines
• Processing dense information
• Making data-informed decisions
• Regulating emotion in high-stakes moments

These are not “soft skills.”

They are enterprise-level competencies developed in environments where the stakes are deeply personal.

To the working parent toggling between a meeting and a pediatric appointment or an insurance adjuster call — I see you.

To the recruiter reviewing a resume and wondering about a pivot or a nonlinear path — know that there are leadership labs happening inside homes every single day.

This season has reminded me of something important:

My professional strengths don’t disappear when life gets complicated. They amplify.

Strategic thinking.
Operational clarity.
Compassionate leadership.
Execution under pressure.

It’s messy. It’s real. And the deliverables are still met.

There is deep intelligence in how working parents move through the world.

And it deserves to be named.